Tuesday, 10 July 2012

An inconsequential fizz of static (i)

A recent American study has shown that the state in which citizens are most likely to waste time is Missouri. Here, workers admitted to spending 3.2 hours a day in a distracted state in which nothing was accomplished. For those of you without a calculator handy that’s 22.4 hours a week, amounting to a mighty 48.5 days a year – full 24-hour days, mind – of staring into space.
I’m trying living at the other end of the spectrum; the end where there’s maybe 15 or 20 minutes a day in which nothing’s actually happening. The rest is either sprinting... (metaphorically speaking of course, though sometimes literally) ...or sleeping (meaning, er - sleeping.)
As a result, I’m on track to finish the re-writes of Sleepwell and Fly/Poisonboy by the end of September. I’m churning out 4,000 words a week outside of the punishing day job.
If you want a taste of this thrilling lifestyle - and boy-oh-boy, who wouldn’t – I recommend two things. One of them at least is really useful.
Firstly, don’t watch any TV. I can’t claim to have managed zero TV exactly, but I’m pretty damn close.  Total minutes of footy watched during the Euros? About 40 minutes across the competition. (Incidentally – number of goals I saw scored? 1. Draw whatever conclusions suit you.) Total minutes of tennis watched during the two weeks of Wimbledon? 30. What else… there’s been two episodes of Buffy – season five if you must know – and one movie, three times. (Kiki’s Delivery Service; the little one loves it.) And that’s it. I even gave Wallander a miss, dedicated soul that I am.
Secondly; here’s something with a bit more heft. Does 10,000 words a week sound like a pleasingly prodigious output? Hell, yes I hear you cry. I really enjoyed this blog post. It’s friendly and calm and supportive and most of all, impressive. Check it out.
Finally, I want you to know I’m not utterly masochistically stupid. I included a week off in the schedule I gave those good people at Chicken House, during which I will shelter from the rain in a barn in Norfolk. Probably watching Kiki.
Whatever. Enjoy this humdrum and sunless summer, wherever it takes you.